I’ve never had much luck with cars. It started with a small brown Honda Civic (my first car!) which I owned for 6 months before we realized it had a cracked engine block (my first dead car!).

I traded it in for a 1984 Subaru GL. I loved that little car. But after a year, it died.

Then I bought a 1986 Black Subaru GL wagon. That car kicked so much ass. It had tinted windows, a great stereo, skater stickers all over the back, and a paint job that looked like it had been run through a chain-link fence. Sadly, that car only lasted nine months before the automatic transmission fell out of the bottom. Darn.

The next car to be run into the ground was run into the ground, literally. It was a 1989 Ford Taurus wagon and the bitch tried to kill me.

Finally, I bought a 1995 Oldsmobile Sierra Cruiser Wagon. I’ve had it since 1997 and the car has only done me minimal harm.

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